https://conscious.is/blogs/holding-people-accountable-is-ineffective-leadership

Accountability is Not Effective Leadership

If leaders have hold people accountable, they either have the wrong team members or are themselves ineffective leaders. The practice of "holding accountable" is rooted in a blame culture and implies a lack of attention to employee performance or consequences for failures.

Distinction Between Accountability and Responsibility:

Accountability (external process) vs. Responsibility (internal process).

• Responsibility can't be assigned by someone else; it must be taken up voluntarily.
• Responsibility is being in a state of integrity and impeccable agreements.
• Responsibility includes:
  • clarity in task assignment
  • consistently fulfilling agreements
  • renegotiating unfeasible agreements
  • addressing broken ones

Taking Responsibility

People must take responsibility for their actions. Leaders must foster a culture of responsibility.

Instead of relying on others to keep them in check, team members should track their own commitments and proactively address any unfulfilled agreements. This approach, the author argues, encourages a sense of personal ownership and fosters self-responsibility among team members.

The Role of Leaders

Leaders should shift away from holding people accountable; instead create an environment where team members take responsibility for their own actions:

• promote relationships built on clear agreements
• teach the team to work in this manner
• collectively committ to this approach

The result is a shift from a blame culture & resentment to mutual responsibility and productivity.

Application in Parenting

This principle of fostering responsibility over enforcing accountability can be effective in parenting as well. Parents can empower their children to make clear agreements and take responsibility for them, thereby creating a more cooperative and less stressful family dynamic.